Thursday, April 11, 2013

naked, existentially dejected

another day, another long solitary day.

was awaken at 6:45am...the earliest I believe I have been awaken in a year. Not a good start.

You know, I'm tired of being alone. I want to embrace life fully, but it's hard some days. I feel punished for having a child. No friends, or if I do talk to someone, it's automatically assumed of what I can't do. No invites out, no hanging out. "Oh sorry, you have a kid, so you wouldn't want to hang out, etc" Empty promises, broken promises.

Maybe my son will have it better than I did.

I surely hope so.

Oh well, maybe one day I will be truly smiling, not forcing one.

*goes back to reading*

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